Happy New Year

So it’s your last day, aye!

Then you’re off the hook,

sayonara! ur revoir!

c’est la vie!

365 days of poetry

is no minor feat, especially

the third time around, Geez—

to say your daily musing will be missed

would be an understatement, I admit

I’m guilty of my daily dose, except—

Char, you’ve got moxie.

(“and that’s what I appreciates most about you”)

So when the clock strikes twelve

full of champagne cheer, Hark!

Hear, Hear! That firework’s for you

and a happy, Happy New Year!

high

now dazzling light

explores my vision

with daylight eyes

i see

a traveler’s thought

just when it seems to get a little easier

I see an old, old man hardly able to walk

who cannot understand the restroom sign

whose daughter struggles to explain

and whose wife knows less than he—

watching this I realize how very easy I have it

and how very able I should be.

just when it seems to get a little easier

I sit here aimless as an empty hand

begging for tomorrow, just to forget today—

but I’ve seen enough to know

my drama’s just a traveler’s thought

wasted (but not wasted) at the airport

purity

i never intended

to live so many lives

or to be so many people

shifting from desire

to return to myself—

filling my cup with

the strangest confetti

the universe allowed—

only to end upside down

intoxicated by the unavoidable

purity

to exist without existing

this god damn ghost of me

if i could live with someone’s hope

forever till we part

i’d at least be able to see

beyond the ashes on my fingertips

and the cough tucked under-sleeve,

perhaps then maybe i could sleep?

longer than it takes to wake and find

who i’m not, or who i’d rather be—

cause it’s such a drag to smile

then to give a laughing nod,

that even when i do it’s like

my mind just says enough—

so when sitting becomes quiet

with my shadow and the curb

i hear within the darkest corner

that hope i don’t deserve.

and if i know you well enough

i know you’ll disagree,

still hopelessly devoted to

this god damn ghost of me.

and it’s hardly ever good enough

in retrospect you’ll see

that hope distilled in all of us

is that in which i bleed—

my Whale worries

That dark wave I told you would come

has in fact come, and come courageous.

It knows my tricks and secrets.

It knows my truth’s a liar.

But I knew that he would come,

I taunted him in fact—believing

my Whale worries—Bah!

There’s never peace here,

only in oblivion.

And at the crest of this wave

I know there’s a break—

long enough to catch

my breath.

Then another.

And after that wave,

another death.

Ashes to Ashes

There’s no denying that’s a pretty face
There’s no excuse still for being late
The corner store’s got a sale on
Greeting cards that sell have price love
There’s truth in breathing at an even pace
There’s beauty bending to bear the weight
Now either way you feel overwhelmed
Exchanging coffee for whiskey now
I’ve got a big bad wolf of a habit
Full of hot air and over dramatics
Got a house built solely of glass when
I huff and puff well nothing happens
I gave her cashmere for Christmas once
She gave me friendship when I had none
There’s proof in putting a sweater on
The back of someone you’re giving up
I’ve got a big bad wolf of a habit
Full of disdain for love when I have it
Got a house built solely of glass and
No stones left to throw just ashes ashes

Smile

What a bore it is

To see yourself

Reflected in the eye

Of another’s

Lonesome smile

Where you can see

The charade

Designed like a maze

Where nobody gets out

And everyone’s stuck—

Feeling most unwell

50/50 split

Some days it’s a blessing

Others it’s a curse

Today’s a bit of both

I’ll only make it worse—

Perhaps this awful feeling’s

A 50/50 split

We balance our emotions

Like Humpty Dumpty did

But come on little Lucy

Fairies don’t exist

The sky ain’t full of diamonds

Your LSD is shit

If proof deserves a reason

I’m aimless as a kid

The message in the pavement

It’s cold covered in spit—

On days that it’s a blessing

Send someone for the hearse

When truth sounds like confession

On those days it’s a curse

Broken Hearts in Four Parts

Give me a second just to catch my breath

You’re cold as the Winter gonna catch your death

Each morning’s a race you better hold me down

I watch as you paint away your lovers frown—

Night falls quicker when you try to conceive

Words without action make you hard to believe

Was my first impression just a go around

Replaced by the fiction of this hippie town—

Excuse my suggestion for removing hearts

Release this suspension and we fall apart

Her name’s in your mouth like a cherry twist

My faith felt outsmarted by your lovers kiss—

So give me a second my world’s upside down

Revolving around this fucking city now

A due course of action is a simple fix

It’s easy to see now that I’m not transfixed