don’t think twice it’s alright

She said she had nothing to say

and the hard part was

that I kind of believed her.

She had it sometimes, this spark

but never really fleshed it out.

And even when she did

she always just kind of played the part

but never really got it how I saw it in her.

I think I just wanted her to be this muse

which she understood she couldn’t be.

Not because she didn’t want to but rather

because she’d already given so much of herself

that there really wasn’t more to give.

And what’s the point of giving your all

to something that never really gave you anything

but headaches and a broken heart?

Oh how we live for those who treat us like dirt

because in the end we respect them better than

the rest who smile and nod and tell us how

good of a job we’re doing just to get through the day.

But they don’t really care. To them

we might as well not even exist. I mean really

who do you call when you’re at rock bottom?

You call the ones you’ve loved, lost, and

will love regardless of the pain they’ve caused

because even when she said she had nothing

to say, I knew better than that.

I just pray she wasn’t telling the truth.

Hell even when I have nothing to say

I have something to say. But that’s me.

That wasn’t and will never be her.

“So don’t think twice it’s alright.”

Bob Dylan said that.

“I’ll let you be in my dream if I can be in yours.”

Bob Dylan also said that.

“Write with fire,” I said that.

I’m probably taking this harder than I should

but that’s who I am and what I do.

I know this. I admit it. I am this.

There is no turning it off, no turning back.

I’ll wake up tomorrow pen in hand regardless.

Don’t it feel good? That spark. Like fire, right?

You just can’t put it down no matter how hard you try.

See, you don’t choose it, it chooses you.

And if you don’t say it, someone will.

It’s all just wishful thinking in the end

so here’s another penny to the well

funny how it doesn’t even make a splash anymore.

Dead is never Dead

Nothing

Dead

is ever fully Dead

until it is

But even then

we play with it

we spoil it

we serve it

We give it enough strength

so that it can live again

Even when it kills us

Dead is never Dead

peace.

All is quiet yet again

and I know what I must do

as if tasting coffee

for the first time

8:52

I drink slowly, carefully

cautiously

while sunlight enters the room

and from my window I can see

I am nothing

I am nothing more than

what I choose to be

and what I’ve chosen

this morning

is peace.

Angels

Don’t you dare close your eyes

like there’s nothing to see

or tell me there’s no reason to be

foolish and fragile and fearful of love

for love is the Ark which braved the flood

Hell I don’t know uh single Saint

but I see Angels every day

they’re all around us can’t you see

in him in her in you and me.

a bad artist

At the end of the day

when my feet are sore

when my mind is heavy

and I can’t take anymore.

Playing with matches I paint.

I paint such beautiful pictures

in my heart that burns

which no one can see

because I’m no painter

I’m just a bad artist

fingering napalm.

another way

Man will never miss a chance

to kill another man

even in times of peace and relative

prosperity man will always find a way.

It’s a tired tale but we read it everyday.

Man oh man can’t we find another way?

hills of Mulholland

How far West are you willing to go

she asked in the hills of Mulholland

Far enough I said, gripping the dash

Flooring it through winding curves

she closed her eyes and said

If it’s not over the edge than don’t bother

And that’s when I knew she’d never exist

Hitting the breaks and pulling over

I looked out upon the city

quietly

I was alone

the woe that binds

It’s a shame

how much more

I need all of them

the one’s I have loved

when I break they bend

made not of wood

or stone just amends

a man on his knees

who now understands

the difference between

women and men

is the woe that binds

two hearts like a thread.

deserted summers

like fine grains

of sand

everyone I love

falls through my hands

to a beach

of salty air

and deserted

summers

I wade

at bay with the tide

which pulls me

further

and further

from the shore