What’s the point in asking the question
If your voice is already defeated
I’d go blind just trying to see it
You know everyone is trying to beat it—
If there’s pain then that means there’s a reason
If there’s truth then it’s hard to believe in
Still it’s hard not to relive this feeling
Where everyone everyone’s stealing—
It’s like selling your grief for a grievance
Why the hell would you even break even
Doing all we could to deceive them
It’s all wasted time wasting time healing—
It’s like playing pretend dressed in your skin
Or saying the pledge of allegiance
When there’s no one to please or believe in
It only matters as much as you mean it
You read my sadness
Word for word
Like I’m a novelty
Then put me down
Back in my place
Some oldtime tchotchke—
And I wonder how it feels,
Window shopping too?—
From the corner of my gladness
To the outskirts of your sadness
Where nothing is for certain
And no one is to blame
Except we don’t glimmer anymore
Or sparkle like we used to—
Ornamental at our best
Tokens from another life
I was in love with the odds of failure
so I did all I could to succeed, and did.
All in the same go, all in the same stop.
Now all we have’s the memory.
I’ll keep the one to forget
if you keep the one to remember.
The one never to forget,
the ones kept best from afar,
and the occasional Holiday on ice.
I’ve tasted many tongues,
but saved the slammed doors
and holes in sheet rock for
the one’s I’d somehow outgrown,
knowing them sincere like
an afternoon alone or
tastebuds in the morning sun—
after enough drinks to make me social,
after enough drinks to make me honest,
after enough drinks to make me pure—
unwilling to apologize for the bad taste
tongue tied like a little kid hoping
to be lost in the shuffle and left alone,
where features seize to be and
voices make no sound where
nobody feels and nobody hurts.
We’re all just kind of nowhere, aren’t we?
When we convince ourselves we’re not,
that we’re somewhere worth being?
Then like flypaper pulled apart
time disconnects from space
and we’re left stuck
sticking to the things we swore we’d part.
And just like that
we’re nowhere again,
left waiting to forget how good it felt
to be somewhere.
There was no hope for us then
We were already too far gone
Gone from where? Neither could tell
But going gone, regardless.
There’s something cynical in your smile
as if I rubbed off some and forgot to say,
that I’m not that kind of cynic.
And I feel no joy from any of this.
Remember— oh brothers and sisters
that we are the philosophers of our time.
Us haggard poets of principle and measure,
no matter the plight must rise.
Through tears of understanding
with honest eyes do I
accept thy pleasure’s burden—
to see within our time.