the other day.

I made Pico de Gallo

the other day

and it needed salt

so I added salt

then put it away.

Then I took a nap

and woke up

more tired

than I’d been before I’d shut my eyes.

Then I wrote a song

drank some beer and

called it a day.

Nobody had to know I existed

and I was fine with that.

The Pico still needs work though,

I’ll send word.

Saturday morning

Saturday morning

woke me up

scratching and sour.

Then I wrecked my pants

feeling lousy, still

I went to my workshop

estranged from the world

yet there in that room

among strangers

who some

I call friends

I felt

Inspired

& well

Happy

So we told our stories

and while listening to Avi read about

Bob in a shipyard explosion

all that other stuff just kind of

went away.

Rapid Eye Movement

You are an embarrassment

he said while picking my pockets

vacant I stared idle

in an undisclosed location

Danielle sat next to me

tenderly stroking the inside flesh

of my arm although

we’d only spoken a handful of times

back in grade school, he said again

Nobody likes you, you know

So I just agreed with him because

her fingers felt like grasshopper wings

fluttering through my mind, he

looked a deep sorrow longer

and that’s where he began to cry

I am sorry my friend, I said while he

cradled me like a new born lamb

only I was much bigger than him

so by the end of it it was I who was

more so doing the cradling, then

as he disappeared effortlessly

Danielle and I sat a long while

next to one another, her hair

long dark and full of whispers

while the room filled with necessary strangers

Holding hands for a while she said,

you aren’t that bad you know

he just really loves you is the point

and then too disappeared into a sea of snakes

which I could not swim

while the couch turned to an island

I sat sipping from my cup

the bitter dark liquid I had earlier poured.

sometimes pigs do fly

I have past the point of no return

where apologies have lost there meaning

Where no explanation is needed

because hell has frozen over, and I swear

I saw a pig fly the other night

but perhaps that was just my reflection

bopping down Magnolia Boulevard

watching taillights fade

and counting them like crows

One, then two, and four and eight

Oh I thought, what a burden it is to sleep

and what a wonder it is to wake.

I made a phone call that night too

and said some terrible things

that by way of the universe

I guess I just needed to say.

I am that guy sometimes — not all —

but sometimes pigs do fly.

So this is who I am

I won’t apologize

Good luck out there

If you stop judging it all,

it’s actually quite wonderful.

Nobody sleeps.

Nobody

sleeps. We

just break our feet

and walk again.

And again.

And again.

Then awake as if

from a dream

in a rented room

which smells of

antiseptic soap.

And like a child

waiting to be fed

we struggle

struggle to breathe

struggle to see

struggle to hear

we struggle to be

like we wish we had been

all those years

we couldn’t sleep.

Shaking hands

I’m not very good at shaking hands

I just kind of put my hand out there

and well

try to match the shake of the other.

I guess I sort of know what that

says about my character, but

I’m cool with that, you know.

Sure I told him

without even saying a word — the courtesy

hug thereafter well, that’s a whole other story.

A thought while listening to jazz.

When we accept

that we know nothing

perhaps then,

we hold the power

to

know everything.

a new life

As much as I want to resist

As hard as it all is

Like a caged bird released

I have to start a new life

And it’s not an escape this time

but rather a strange consequence

of choice that if it turns out

I’m running again than fuck it

like Vanilla Sky I’m gonna fly

Complete.

Every once in a while

I see myself come back to myself

in a skewed sidewalk reflection

somewhere, out there, I am

Complete.

Robin Williams

Robin Williams

under the right light

had the warmest

coldest, sincere

blue eyes.

Oh, those blue

blue eyes.

Like Arctic waters

were those sad blue eyes.

Just a man who

made voices

who made miracles

who made hearts sing

who made hearts sigh

though he couldn’t see himself

without those majestic blue eyes.

So perhaps he made a choice

with all depression laid aside

to go out as himself

before disease could take his mind

before it could wash away

those blue blue eyes.