Listening in
on a socially
distant therapy
circle, I hear strange
certainty fading
with each spilled sip
of coffee, squandered
on psychosocial thoughts
in alignment with
the universe
always.

Home » Posts tagged 'blue'
Listening in
on a socially
distant therapy
circle, I hear strange
certainty fading
with each spilled sip
of coffee, squandered
on psychosocial thoughts
in alignment with
the universe
always.
When I was a kid—after bedtime—as quietly as I could, I would crawl from my bed, onto the floor, then elbow and knee my way down the hallway to lay in the doorway of my brothers room to watch his television.
He’s four years older than I am and, well, I thought he was really cool.
One, for having a TV in his bedroom. And two, for probably knowing I was there but not saying anything.
Whatever he was watching didn’t really make a difference but it was comfortable there, on the carpet, with the blue light flashing.
A dark bedroom can be pretty scary to a child, especially during a thunderstorm.
Now that we’re older, we speak when it is necessary, but not all the time.
Probably less than either of us cares to admit.
He’s a busy working husband and parent while I’m pretty much all over the map.
Though when we do talk, it’s a meaningful talk of mutual reflection. He provides me with information from four years down the line and I remind him that I’m listening by offering whatever small insights are on my mind.
I thought he was great then and I still do now. No matter the distance the bond between two brothers is strong and unwavering.
Basically what I am saying is I look forward to the next time we’re able to watch a little TV, crack a couple jokes, and just hang out—without any pressure—even if it means the carpet or floor, that’ll be enough.
Blades of grass
beneath my feet
rise and fall
and spring back
towards
my perception of sky,
and my eyes are blue
and my vision is clear
and I’m seeing sevens,
while my shadow flutters
and becomes the tree
which stands still as death
O Heavens! O Heavens!
your child’s due rebellion—
a gift,
now I can finally see.
I think I’d rather not
I mean ok
Let me walk a block
Get my thoughts straight
Try and help out
Make you feel great
If this was high school
Basket case.
I think I’d like that
I mean no don’t
If you bite back
I could go home
Take my shoes off
Draw a warm bath
Some use a toaster
Here I’ll right back.
Got a new job
Got a new face
Got some new friends
To help replace
No that ain’t right
I mean ok
It’s a bad trip
Depends what you take.
Is that a sick joke
Or the new wave
Is that a cut throat
Or a switchblade
Is this real life
Or a showcase
No one can hurt you
Just be brave.
Had a dog once
His name was courage
He could sense pain
Like a surgeon
One day I woke up
He had broken
His chain and ran off
But that’s the breaks kid.
See the sunshine
And the bus stop
See the shadows
And the rooftops
Even your grumpy
Great grandpa
Smiles sometimes
Don’t last long.
So if you feel bad
Just know I like you
If you feel sad
I’ll feel sad too
We’ll sing a singalong
In a sad room
Kid it’s ok
To feel blue too.
I never wanted to define you
Just wanted to walk calm beside you
But do I ever do a thing at all?
I never knew how to excite you
Just wanted to be like the fly who
Hung around loving your every move.
I never knew a second chance
As good as that first romance
A third time will only get you killed.
My palms are cold and sweaty now
It makes no difference any how
Like a has been actor thinking what’s the use?
I say it’s maybe
the way God made me
You say it’s crazy
that I’m this damn lazy
I’m addicted maybe
but it’s better this way
After awhile I’ll be all right
I’ll be alright, so.
I think I’ll watch the Super Bowl
Then re-runs of a TV show
Any distraction for two years will do.
I think I’ll start a private club
Then forget and invite everyone
Come one come all come make me feel good.
I never wanted to become
This ordinary silly chum
Up for hours feeling numb and blue.
There’s this movie playing in my head
There’s a plane a girl a detective
Who’s method acting’s got him nowhere new.
You say it’s maybe
the way God made me
And that hey baby
you’re a little lazy
but it’s better this way
this addiction’s crazy
After awhile you’ll be all right
You’ll be alright, so.
The thing that I am trying tell
The thing impossible to sell
A clear cut diamond people get confused.
I never wanted anymore
Than a reason to explore
The imperfections that I found in you.
Like that picture on the cellar door
A sad clown I just couldn’t ignore
His eyes were mine yes they were tried and true.
I wonder if no now I’m bored
I’ll take a couple then some more
Searching my pockets for my next excuse.
I mean anyone will do.
flesh
against
flesh
against
flesh
against
flesh
against
sheets
pulled over
a clear blue
morning.
Robin Williams
under the right light
had the warmest
coldest, sincere
blue eyes.
Oh, those blue
blue eyes.
Like Arctic waters
were those sad blue eyes.
Just a man who
made voices
who made miracles
who made hearts sing
who made hearts sigh
though he couldn’t see himself
without those majestic blue eyes.
So perhaps he made a choice
with all depression laid aside
to go out as himself
before disease could take his mind
before it could wash away
those blue blue eyes.
Scott wouldn’t let me leave
he said
where do you have to go?
Stay, have another
we’re your friends you know.
How much cash you got?
That’s it, no more
21 dollars even
and thanks for being here.
blue jay’s back, cloaked in sun
hopping from grass to concrete
his colors I lack, flutter from wings
they drift-float-and-pass all around me
as I turn my back, cloaked in shade
I can’t tell if he’s mocking or loves me