Home » Posts tagged 'night'
I don’t wish to have the answers
for any questions of concern
just know that I am working
my hardest in reverse
to tame the wild memories
once thought of as a curse
those now that are a blessing
from the backseat of a hearse,
cause friendship it has shown me
like the calm hand of a nurse
the answers to the questions
where love’s the only cure.
For once I’ve got nothing to say.
And that’s o.k.
Or, no…(insert breathe here)
Best not talk about it.
Best leave’er be.
Besides it’s 6:00am and
I can’t sleep so you tell me?
See, the sun’s still going to rise
and I’m still going to run
and Allen’s still going to love
everything and everyone.
And now that I believe again,
so it is, as it was, as it’s always been.
Light and love, light and love, light and love.
How curious it is that I
no longer beg or question why
but rather like the naked eye
accepts the sky is blue—
with honesty and strength that I’ve
been granted through these tales of time
woven as one as you are I
accepts the ancient truth,
for like the moon and sun decide
to shed or shield eternal light
with arms spread thin wide opened eye
keep mine closed now to see,
what beauty lies beyond the pine
is neither up to you nor I
it’s always been like time gone by
regardless of the proof—
in truth it’s curious that I
could feel so pure estranged from life
whose meadow in the golden light
is heaven here on earth.
broken leaves at sundown
set fire to the trees
drinking from the heavens
of nature’s crystal spring
yellow jacket bumbling
curious honey bees
as blades of grass we tango
bound for eternity
This life’s a beautiful disaster penned one summer long ago
I mean who was I kidding just a kid on the East Coast
So I took my car and drove off found myself out on the road
I was so sure I was different but so scared of letting go
Had this girl her name was pure like it was written in the stars
I first met her in the backseat of my good friends mother’s car
And I don’t quite know how it happened tangled alone in the dark
But she showed me true compassion for a badly broken heart
And if you ever saw the way her fingers danced upon my hand
Love’s an infinite reminder I just couldn’t understand
She was beautiful regardless of the way things had to end
I’m just happy to have seen her grown and happy as a friend
Somewhere before and after I had lost my innocence
Was a child when I said come on let’s go what’s happening
Like a judge biting my tongue so long held on to my defense
Till one day it all poured out like a volcano from my head
You talk too much don’t talk enough try this paper and pen
I think that it’ll help to write it down is what she said
And of course guess what it happened but this time in a kitchen
We were kindred drunk and carefree at first sight I do admit
I wasn’t looking for a lover in retrospect needed a friend
But that’s the way it happens Cupid’s always looking in
When she took me without question I knew something had to give
Had more talent in her pinky than I swear I ever did
And she tried hard to convince me I was good at fitting in
Still my anger got the best of me and then the fear to live
See it took 6 months of depression just to make one decision
I would have should have could have now son that’s no way to live
I thought if I just disappear perhaps I’d be no one’s burden
But learned life is a disaster that you somehow have to live
So I packed my bags one day and gave myself unto the wind
Hell I’ve been kicking rocks forever so I’m hella used to it
See there’s no way of ever knowing how tomorrow’s gonna end
You just get up brush your hair and then go do it again
Still love’s an infinite reminder I’ve tried so hard to understand
It always makes more sense when you’re left with empty hands
Like a psychic I am reading all the lines riddles and man
I can see it all so clearly first accept yourself and then
Maybe you get lucky one day in Central Park
Or perhaps while spilling coffee on a stranger after dark
There’s a reason for each season as one ends one’s soon to start
It only takes a moment kiddo ready on your mark
I spared him a quarter
alone where he stood
next to the Madonna
as if she’d do him good.
He gave me a blessing
gentle and aware
the wind it was violent
messing both our hair.
While Girl Scouts are selling
cookies for the troop
a week ago maybe
someone died on that stoop.
But don’t tell their mothers
as if they would care
no you don’t get the badge unless
you’ve sold your soul there.
My eyes they grow weary
still I can’t look away
at the hummingbird dancing
a loneliness grave,
still I’ve got this feeling
that there’s no escape
am I ok to drive? I guess or else just look away.
Am I ok to drive? I guess, if not well either way.
At the cafe I buy coffee
either iced or cold brew
the barista he tells me
nothing’s ever new.
But still I ask questions
like how do you do
and she recalls my name
it’s the least she could do.
I don’t mean to sound faithless
I’ve just seen enough kicks
see the old man he died, well
some things never make sense.
It’s slight of the hand, it’s
a scam with three cups
you follow the ball then
it’s gone where it was.
My eyes they burn red with
the heat of the day
it’s winter in Burbank
what more can I say,
still I’ve got this feeling
that there’s no escape
am I ok to drive? I guess or else just look away.
Am I ok to drive? I guess, if not well either way.
Now I take to the bar, where
Happy Hour’s till 6
Scott the tender he knows me
pours my whiskey then gin.
What’s the good word? Pal, tell me
do you think that you could
spare me knowledge like change would
do me some type of good.
I don’t stay past the hour
happiness never lasts
after shame there comes flowers
then of course there’s the past.
You’re a good guy he tells me
see the pain never lasts
I assure you it does, Scott
he just nods then he laughs.
See there’s beauty in living
it’s just hidden by stars
who illuminate sidewalks
like two subtle hearts,
still I’ve got this feeling
that there’s no escape
it’s an obvious cycle, one I’ll never break.(?)
Am I ok to drive? I guess or else just look away.
Am I ok to drive? I guess, if not well either way.
What’s there left to say
on days like today
Where everything stops
the light just turns grey
The moon and the mind
become one entwined
with fear as bright as the stars
So come with me now
still I have my doubts
But isn’t it fun
sometimes to run
Where no one can see
just listen to me
for once I’ve got nothing to say
It’s all just
too much to take
On days as grey as today
Where no one
gets what they want
they all just walk in the park
Ain’t it better here in the dark?
There’s a place and a time
in the back of my mind
where you and I hide
when you’re so inclined
It’s a place where the grey
hours of day, commit not to say anything.
So come with me there
forget all your fears
Knock-knock orange you glad
I’ve got the blues bad
Just stay with me now
and let’s talk about
anything other than this
These days I don’t think I’ll miss.
Their love before friends
as it always begins
then the world spun round
again and again.
Friends for the last
few phases of moon
the universe beckons
neither one to choose.
Spoken rather wisely
alone though in tune
while the world spun again
with nothing to lose.
Eyes look to the West
in Africa too
Eyes look to the East
this Hollywood noon.
There’s nothing to pardon
and no more to do
angelic they parted —
two drifters anew.
Got up this morning ahead of my time
shook fear from my hair and tears from my eyes
took to the mirror and spoke to this guy
who said he knew me from before —
it’s there that he unlocked the door.
He gave me a sunrise he gave me his hand
he told me a secret I could understand
life isn’t a journey or destination
it’s your choice to choose to buy in —
for me it’s better not to win.
So I sharpened my memory and tore out his tongue
recycled the organ from which I’d dislodged
filled it with the secret and sealed it shut
if X marks the spot then I’m fine —
love’s just footnotes in nursery rhyme.
Connecting the dots which soon filled my head
aligned with ideas I spoke with each step
life ain’t no cake walk or deal with respect
it’s your throat or mine well of course —
I’d take mine to spare you the course.
It’s kill or be killed so I’m on my knees
no fear any longer just tranquility
it’s obvious ain’t it half hearted pity
runs deep like the roots of despair —
no one’s got the cure or should dare.
So with that in mind one swift hit should do
a hole in the head hell it ain’t nothing new
I was head over heals now I’m sinking through
the clouds which look soft from afar —
at the end of this there’s only dark.
With all things considered it’s lovely I guess
like spilled paint confetti this hole in my chest
I’ve dug it before since third grade I guess
my actions speak louder than words —
it’s all been a blessing and curse.
Look at me lovely this here is I guess
a mixture of meanings which help to make sense
of the past which gave us nothing but suspense
with fearful longing and a mother’s defense.
Look at me lovely with eyes in full bloom
now imagine a child alone in his room
the covers are pulled tight warm as a womb
his head full of static his heart thumping doom.
Look at me lovely take into account
these present day feelings are years gone without
comfort or closure confused full of doubt
exchanged for composure now deep underground.
Look at me lovely two decades gone by
and please ask yourself to whom do you cry
an eye for an eye I used to imply
now I want nothing more than to sleep through night.
Look at me lovely with infinite jest
this smile is armor for that I confess
in daydreams I make up reasons quite complex
for nightmares which haunted that boy in his bed.
Look at me lovely it’s lovely in fact
walking down sidewalks avoiding the cracks
though sometimes it feels like breaking your back
the pain that defines us with love cannot last.
Look at me lovely with harlequin eyes
for we are not wells that dry up inside
and take with you this last line then decide
his failure’s your lesson, her nurture’s your pride.
