Home » Posts tagged 'people' (Page 34)
Saturday morning
woke me up
scratching and sour.
Then I wrecked my pants
feeling lousy, still
I went to my workshop
estranged from the world
yet there in that room
among strangers
who some
I call friends
I felt
Inspired
& well
Happy
So we told our stories
and while listening to Avi read about
Bob in a shipyard explosion
all that other stuff just kind of
went away.
You are an embarrassment
he said while picking my pockets
vacant I stared idle
in an undisclosed location
Danielle sat next to me
tenderly stroking the inside flesh
of my arm although
we’d only spoken a handful of times
back in grade school, he said again
Nobody likes you, you know
So I just agreed with him because
her fingers felt like grasshopper wings
fluttering through my mind, he
looked a deep sorrow longer
and that’s where he began to cry
I am sorry my friend, I said while he
cradled me like a new born lamb
only I was much bigger than him
so by the end of it it was I who was
more so doing the cradling, then
as he disappeared effortlessly
Danielle and I sat a long while
next to one another, her hair
long dark and full of whispers
while the room filled with necessary strangers
Holding hands for a while she said,
you aren’t that bad you know
he just really loves you is the point
and then too disappeared into a sea of snakes
which I could not swim
while the couch turned to an island
I sat sipping from my cup
the bitter dark liquid I had earlier poured.
I have past the point of no return
where apologies have lost there meaning
Where no explanation is needed
because hell has frozen over, and I swear
I saw a pig fly the other night
but perhaps that was just my reflection
bopping down Magnolia Boulevard
watching taillights fade
and counting them like crows
One, then two, and four and eight
Oh I thought, what a burden it is to sleep
and what a wonder it is to wake.
I made a phone call that night too
and said some terrible things
that by way of the universe
I guess I just needed to say.
I am that guy sometimes — not all —
but sometimes pigs do fly.
So this is who I am
I won’t apologize
Good luck out there
If you stop judging it all,
it’s actually quite wonderful.
When we accept
that we know nothing
perhaps then,
we hold the power
to
know everything.
Before we knew one another
New York City Central Park
feeding ducks in the pond
Austin making quack-quack sounds
and Tina wanting to go
I looked at you for a long while
before you looked at me
and through my camera lense
I took a picture in black and white
your gaze, tender and aware as if to say
I am here and I’m glad you are too
and I nervous in my boyish wonder
trying to play coy though who was I kidding
tip toeing every word as I so often do
upon first meeting before I muck it all up
with the nonsense I carry like tattered old books
though that day there was no room for Paradise Lost
there was no desire for Walden or Poe
stepping lightly off the curb in those Italian Leather loafers
I thought went well with your hesitant smile
perhaps you felt it too when time stopped
not literally but figuratively as real as a care free afternoon
like that which was the fall in Central Park
and I think I even paid for dinner that night which I couldn’t afford
for all four of us since I had the credit
just trying to be nice, because well
you know, I was happy and I think you were too.
I took off my clothes
my skin suit
and rattled my bones
clicked my heels
and down the hatch
I went spiraling forth
into a bleak oblivion
where not even the dark
could hide, I
stood staring into nothing like
a Mona Lisa replica
my conscience hung midair
like a wine stained sheet
pinned neatly to dry
and there were no bones about it
I had completely lost my mind
stumbling down West 4th and Pine
crossing line after line, every time
after time just me, myself, and I
delirious in my delusion
picking homeless men off the street
with tears in both our eyes
I’m no different than you my dear friend
neither are you from I, he said
you’re going to be all right, he said
as for me well, I’ve lived a storied life, he ended
with a reassuring glance as I handed him two dimes
for it was all I had
collecting my clothes
skin suit and conscience
brave the winter, he said
spring needs you
Was she ever happy
or was she just pretending?
Was I?
I agree to disbelieve any such questions.
Foolish notions.
I’ve given it far too much energy
to accept such nonsense
and far too little to concede.
What a crime to disregard our time
together no matter how wild
or foot-dragging it was.
I may be a fool but I’m not a foolish fool.
A pity? No.
We were glorious in our infancy
and though covered in blood and tears
marvelous in our dying days.
So many histories
So many lives
cherished
and now
this.
I see a lot of people
not liking themselves
Whose only hobby it seems
is not liking themselves
Figuring out new ways
of not liking themselves
I see a lot of people who are all the same
holding onto their pain like a talisman
And though it pains me to say it
I’ve still got to say it:
that kettle over there looks rather black.
The perfect body
will never build
the perfect mind
as there is no
perfect mind, there
is no perfect body
but only our minds
lonesome perception
of what perfection
should look like
that no body can ever
really have in mind.
Myself
explored expressed explained
oblivion different reasons
over and over and over again
exposing what I’m feeling
though it never really quite makes sense
unless there’s someone healing
who kind of sort of gets the gist
and cradles their own meaning.
Words Of An Average White Male 