One Philadelphia Night

I took off my clothes

my skin suit

and rattled my bones

clicked my heels

and down the hatch

I went spiraling forth

into a bleak oblivion

where not even the dark

could hide, I

stood staring into nothing like

a Mona Lisa replica

my conscience hung midair

like a wine stained sheet

pinned neatly to dry

and there were no bones about it

I had completely lost my mind

stumbling down West 4th and Pine

crossing line after line, every time

after time just me, myself, and I

delirious in my delusion

picking homeless men off the street

with tears in both our eyes

I’m no different than you my dear friend

neither are you from I, he said

you’re going to be all right, he said

as for me well, I’ve lived a storied life, he ended

with a reassuring glance as I handed him two dimes

for it was all I had

collecting my clothes

skin suit and conscience

brave the winter, he said

spring needs you

that certain something

You can love somebody

anybody

unconditionally

but the one thing you can’t do

is change them. You can’t

make them who you wished

they would be, although

yes it’s there

that certain something

always shining

like a diamond in the rough

sparkling is their beauty

but only for a moments glance

before it’s lost again.

God how I wish I could tell them

of everything that I see within them

of all mine and their desires fulfilled

though they wouldn’t believe me

for they couldn’t see themselves

like I see

their souls burning in denial

wanton and wild

whether it be love or vile

you can love somebody

anybody, but

you can’t change them.

Not really.

All you can do is tell them how you feel.

So tell them.

Chances are

they feel that way too.

another night

At the end of the day

I am nothing but

sweat and fat

and bad breath

and poems

strewn out among sage

and corkscrew, lighter, and coffee mug

wine and love for it all

all the things that I have carried

and still carry till this day

another night

another light

twinkling in the Friday night hysteria

of weekend fun

unseen.

Open Cavity

I fell in love with myself

over and over and out again

until all there was was an

Open Cavity

beat beat beating down the block

beating and always beating

even when it stopped

I fell in love with myself and

that Rocket-shaped mailbox.

affliction or redemption

What’ll it be

said the man

on the stand

to the reflection

looking very grim

sunken eyes

of redemption

come on come on

choose our next addiction

this time though

be aware

aware of my remission

I know I know

what fun is there in that

hell why don’t we find out

it’s either or perhaps

I’ve given you the right

that now I’m taking back

the will to fight the urge

I know that’s what I lack

so taking down the mirror

with no one staring back

the man poured the reflection

with ice into his glass

he calmly took a sip

one more than another

and when the glass was empty

to him it did not bother

just one more

thought the man

understanding his reflection

it’s up to you to choose

affliction or redemption.

backward or forward

However many backward steps

you take today

tomorrow

take that many steps further along the way

because not everyday is a good one

nor is everyday bad, you see

I knew a man no different than

any other shapeless face

who kept on stepping backward

day after day after week after year

until he’d completely lost his way

you see, an inch becomes a foot

and a foot becomes a mile

it’s backward or forward that separates

the man from the grave.

You don’t have to smile

If you’re not smiling today than good.

You don’t have to smile today.

You don’t have to smile tomorrow,

but you will smile again.

And when you do, I’ll be there

telling you I told you so.

And it’s going to be a great time.

It’s going to be better than before.

Better

We’re going to make this better,

for whatever that may mean.

Alone — Separate — Together

Better has many names.

something to think about,

You’re not as cool

as you think you are,

you’re also

not as grotesque.

Just something to

think about, just

something to accept.

Pillow Talk

Alone, is where

everything makes sense.

It is all the other times

that haunt me!

But I’m sleeping better now,

with a few lone nightmares

tucked under my pillow.

Just in case

I get lost in a dream again.

Just in case

I forget how to wake.

Will you, be there to haunt me?

Or have I just been alone

after all this time?

Whether or not you noticed, partner!

I’m kneeling where I stand.