Parlor Tricks

Whatever I had to say

can wait until tomorrow,

with everything else

and all her parlor tricks,

scattering my brain

and blurring my focus—

people have that power over me

that no substance ever dared—

as if a bottle of whiskey

ever could compare

to the power of a woman.

Failure of odds

I was in love with the odds of failure

so I did all I could to succeed, and did.

And didn’t.

All in the same go, all in the same stop.

Another type of love—

I was a handful and

she had very small hands,

handing me love I

couldn’t handle and

it was no secret

we knew eachother’s secrets

quietly speaking through tears

and farewell in exchange

for another type of love—

one we both could afford.

Holiday On Ice.

Now all we have’s the memory.

I’ll keep the one to forget

if you keep the one to remember.

The one never to forget,

the ones kept best from afar,

and the occasional Holiday on ice.

The Crap I Write

I finish the crap I write

over coffee I can’t afford

in the mornings on

my days off from work

and I call it poetry.

Before the ice waters down

my Ethiopian cure

I can usually turn 3 or 4

workable pieces I find alright.

Nothing’s ever perfect and

I don’t strive for perfection anymore.

I just do as I do and that seems

good enough for now, besides

nobody reads poetry anymore unless

you’re dead or one of those Slam poets,

but that’s a pack I’d never run with—

the dead are fine but the Slam, no thank you—

since I’m no actor I haven’t the stomach.

I just know how I feel and put it down

whether or not it kills—HA!

If anybody actually cared what I had to say

I’d still be broke. I’d still be here,

no longer curious but still sincere,

breaking 8 balls and biting glass for reasons

only I can understand.

Walking home I no longer debate, I just

spit laughing blood and repeat,

waiting to be called back and told what to do.

Tongues

I’ve tasted many tongues,

but saved the slammed doors

and holes in sheet rock for

the one’s I’d somehow outgrown,

knowing them sincere like

an afternoon alone or

tastebuds in the morning sun—

after enough drinks to make me social,

after enough drinks to make me honest,

after enough drinks to make me pure—

unwilling to apologize for the bad taste

tongue tied like a little kid hoping

to be lost in the shuffle and left alone,

where features seize to be and

voices make no sound where

nobody feels and nobody hurts.

Southbound towards Tijuana

The way it was and

the way I saw it well

neither really aligned,

which is why I guess

perhaps, I suppose

I’ve made it this far driving

Southbound towards Tijuana

watching my dreams fade

in the rear view mirror

knowing now the utopia I sought

was never bound to be orthodox

or American, or not but

foreign enough to appear genuine,

parked by the halogen glow

of another lone motel, stale air

and stained sheets of a

dystopian relevance

that makes this all seem o.k.

Nowhere

We’re all just kind of nowhere, aren’t we?

When we convince ourselves we’re not,

that we’re somewhere worth being?

Then like flypaper pulled apart

time disconnects from space

and we’re left stuck

sticking to the things we swore we’d part.

And just like that

we’re nowhere again,

left waiting to forget how good it felt

to be somewhere.

Enough.

We go to those we trust

Because even if they hurt us

The least we know’s they care

And knowing that much

Sometimes is enough.

The Other

For every peace I’ve lost

I picked up another

And another, then another

Till I could hardly tell

The difference between

Myself, them—or the other.