Beautiful Days

Beautiful music plays

while I remember—the worst—

most beautiful days.

Austin’s Coffee, 2011

still as the evening air

For some reason, people

just keep on sticking around—

no matter how I push them away.

And God knows I’ve tried, yet

still as the evening air

they remain, willing and shifty

to see me from my darkness

onward, till dawn.

A message from that time I cut myself off from the world. (circa 2009)

What I lost in my depression

What developed over time

Who grew within my absence

Who called but couldn’t find

The person who they once knew

Who only wished to die

Where deep within my fortress

Of solitude did I

Salute them in their merit

Who tried from time to time

To free me from my burden

Which words could not describe

Though even in my heartache

I never told a lie

But took pride in them knowing

Their strength I too could find

That’s why I keep them with me

Past lovers, friends, and my

Gratitude for suffering

This awfully fragile mind

Grown with understanding

Like fruit picked from a vine

I’m grounded by their blessings

And grateful for this life

Breathe

To breathe is a gift we often overlook

though each day we are granted this ability.

Today, breathe deeply, fully

and accept that you are worthy,

to breathe.

Breathe

In the company of friends

I knew I wasn’t kidding anyone

I just never knew how obvious I was

Until they told me and then, well

I just felt a little dumb, but glad, really

to be in the company of friends.

Thanksgiving 2019

I am grateful

Be grateful for what you have,

be it fruit,

family,

or a roof overhead.

And if you’re with someone

who’s grateful for you,

I am grateful.

I am whole.

No longer is the time

to judge what we do not understand,

but rather embrace it.

So easily forgotten

is the ability to learn something new

each and everyday.

To venture the world

and to take a chunk of it mindfully

was told to me once,

and though I’ve stumbled

I’ve never forgotten.

Yesterday’s world is no longer today’s

as yesterday’s confusion fades

my compassion continues

and my gratitude grows

with peace and understanding.

I am whole.

the air of my ancestors

I fill my lungs

with the air of my ancestors

knowing my purpose

is their peace.